Spring

I had meant to write this entry for a long time, but didn’t get to because of marks processing (yes you will get your grades next week).

Anyway, I hope it’s not too late to talk about my Chinese New Year…

So it’s officially over. Chinese New Year is a big affair for both my family and my in-laws’. Things started at least one week before – my mom would buy all the dried food, vegetables, seafood, etc etc for the reunion dinner. My in-laws’ even more elaborate – this year, 4 of us the daughters-in-law, spent at least 5 hours in the kitchen to prepare for the grand dinner for a family of about 40. The amount of food involved was phenomenal.

I like the idea of everyone came home for dinner (not everyday, though – that would be too much for me to handle, considering how “private” I am as a person). I think it represents the warmth and close ties among the family members, especially when it involves 4 generations.

But somehow the atmosphere changes every year.

Family members are coming in later, and spending less time. And I suppose that’s inevitable. As the 3rd generations are growing up, they would spend less time at home – those who are married would need to split their time between their in-laws and here; those who are in their teens and 20s are spending more time with their friends.

Charles Cooley called primary groups the “springs of life”. When we were young, our primary groups could be our family because we spent most of our time at home. As we expand our horizon and our network, we get to know more people through our secondary groups. Eventually we shift focus, breaking down secondary groups to more primary groups. And these are the people who serve as a buffer between us and the demands that our daily lives place on us.

So it is no wonder that the nieces and nephews are spending less time, especially during Chinese New Year (spring time) because they found their “spring” elsewhere.